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and who is good will soon be beautiful || priv darkflame

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and who is good will soon be beautiful || priv darkflame Empty and who is good will soon be beautiful || priv darkflame

Post by ghost on Fri Oct 23, 2020 1:32 am


TANSYPAW
shadowclan apprentice | torbie | dsh | tags

Tansypaw wakes in the night.

A bad dream. As soon as her eyes open, the last vestiges of it leave her mind, leaving only the impression of having been falling and the glint of yellowed teeth under moonglow. Tansypaw wants- she wants to be comforted. She wants to crawl back into the nursery, where the world looks a little more familiar. The apprentices' den is full of long shadows, faint under the pale light of the moon, that stretch and contort. The air is filled with the soft breaths of her clanmates, and suddenly, even that is far too much for Tansypaw to bear.

She pads out of the den in a hurry and is greeted by the cool night air. At such a late time, camp isn't nearly as barren as Tansypaw would have thought it to be. A warrior is sitting vigil near the entrance, his back to Tansypaw as he surveys the expanse of territory he can see from where he sits. A couple lay curled together, a whispered conversation exchanged from the point where their cheeks are pressed together. An elder is playing some kind of solitary game, matching bits of tree bark to discarded leaves of the same species.

Camp is quieter than Tansypaw is used to, but it is always alive. She takes a small comfort in knowing this, and considers going back into the apprentices' den. A fear still lingers, however. Of what, Tansypaw is beyond remembering, but the uneven shadows inside of the den make her more nervous than she cares to admit. She walks to the warriors' den and slips inside.

Darkflame.

Tansypaw spots her with ease, and some of the tension she had carried in her shoulders eases. Her mentor. Trustworthy. Tansypaw has only been an apprentice for three, now four, days, but already she fears she is a poor student. Too frightened of the world to be shown the territory in anything other than parts, over-eager and prone to mistakes in her duties. What if Darkflame grew angry with Tansypaw for coming into this den? She looks over her shoulder, nervous that someone will come barging in to tell Tansypaw off. When no such thing happens, Tansypaw steps a further into the den.

Darkflame wouldn't be mad, Tansypaw hopes, and she hopes fervently. Quietly, she always hopes. Tansypaw hesitates a moment, kneading the nest beneath her paws, then in a moment of bravery, walks two tight circles and lays against Darkflame, feeling a little safer. In her dream, there is a teasing, tittering bird in the tree-tops, singing a familiar song.

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and who is good will soon be beautiful || priv darkflame Empty Re: and who is good will soon be beautiful || priv darkflame

Post by DARKSTAR on Fri Oct 23, 2020 3:49 pm


 fell in love in october 




her dreams are often bittersweet, full of memories of the past, things gone by that she could've changed. she twitches in her sleep, causing warriors around her to grumble, but she can't hear them, caught up in a world where her parents have not let go of her yet. they yell and scream, and all she can do is know that this is a dream, that they ignore her now, that she only has to bare with this for the duration of this sleep.

golden eyes snapping open, she lets out a breath, sending an apologetic look to the warrior next to her, who rolls over with a grunt. her body still feels exhausted, head heavy, eyes sticky with sleep, but she can hear gentle murmuring outside, aware that the guards are awake and the day is coming. her eyes close again.

when the warm body settles down in the crook of her stomach, she feels the comforting pressure, and opens her eyes once more. laying next to her is her apprentice, little tansypaw, who smells of the approaching dawn. she's cuddled into her mentor's dark fur, and darkflame feels her heart melt. the little face, which always looks so worried, is peaceful in sleep. she bends down and gently grooms the dappled fur, easing out the knots in it and smoothing the worry lines on the girl's face. it's peaceful in this den, the sounds of sleeping warriors and the soft rasping of her tongue on her apprentices' coat.


Last edited by darkflame on Sun Oct 25, 2020 2:18 am; edited 1 time in total

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Post by ghost on Sun Oct 25, 2020 12:00 am


TANSYPAW
shadowclan apprentice | torbie | dsh | tags

When she next wakes, she is warm and safe. There is a purr in her throat, inaudible but with enough strength that she can feel it shaking in her chest. It's a slow rise to consciousness, one where facts trickle in at a snail's pace. First: she is warm, she is safe. Second: dawn has broken. Third: She is laying against someone as opposed to laying on a nest. Fourth: She's an apprentice! Fifth: This, she thinks, is what it must feel like to be loved.

It's with this thought that her purrs stop abruptly and she jerks her head up, blinking the sleep from her eyes as she takes in the sight of her mentor. Who she sought out because she was scared. Embarrassed, Tansypaw stands and takes a few quick steps backwards, narrowly avoiding tripping over a sleeping figure behind her, ”Sorry- sorry!” Tansypaw ducks out of the den, stopping near the entrance. A large part of her wants to hide before Darkflame could catch up with her.

Tansypaw wasn't supposed to be in there. Darkflame must think she's bad now. Too clingy. Tansypaw can do better! She can! The only trouble is that she doesn't want to do better. Or, more accurately, Tansypaw wants to do better in her mind, but in the moments her heart makes her decisions, it always chooses the wrong ones. She thinks of her mother, who doles out affection as a reward and withdrawals it with a misstep, and she thinks Darkflame must be like that.

The trouble is, above all else, that Tansypaw likes the attention. She craves it like the parched crave a drink, something that can be ignored until one is given a single drop. She just wants to be good, just wants to be good enough that someone will like her, but isn't that selfish? Not wanting to be good for the sake of it, but to gain something?

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Post by DARKSTAR on Sun Oct 25, 2020 2:29 am



 fell in love in october 


 she's warm and content, the soft rumbling purr from her apprentice sending joy through her heart. hearing tansypaw happy is a new thing for darkflame, who has gotten used to the concentrated, worrisome little one. she feels for the girl, knows what it's like to have overeager parents, a family that doesn't dole out affection voluntarily. she knows it hurts, and so she's vowed to do her best to love tansypaw as a mother, as a sister, as a friend and mentor. it's with a concerned blink that she gazes down at her now awake apprentice and sees the fear in her eyes. tansy leaps from the nest, leaving chilly air to sweep in and take her place. as the girl stumbles from the den, darkflame tips her head, worry replacing the comforting warmth in her heart. getting to her paws, she hurries after the dappled femme, catching up with her near the entrance. tansypaw looks scared, looks terrified, her eyes wide, her heart pounding. it breaks darkflame's heart.

 "dear girl, what's wrong?" she has always spoken with a motherly tone, but right now it seems almost amplified. she gazes with a confused comfort at the mottled apprentice. "are you worried about being in the warriors' den last night? tansypaw, you didn't wake me up. nobody minded it's all okay." but she knows the girl, knows she'll have just more things to worry about. it's something they're working on. she'll let out a soft laugh, hoping to ease the girl's worries. "it was nice to wake up to a warm nest." 

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THEY'RE SO PRETTY IT HURTS  
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Post by ghost on Mon Oct 26, 2020 12:51 am



TANSYPAW
shadowclan apprentice | torbie | dsh | tags

Darkflame appears at her side. She knew Darkflame would show up, and she likes that Darkflame called her dear girl, and she likes that Darkflame followed as equally as she hates it. She looks up to Darkflame, then to her paws, scuffing the dirt as Darkflame speaks. She asks if it's about Tansypaw being in the warriors' den, and that's part of it, but it's a small part, an easy to explain part.

Tansypaw nods, still focused on her paws. It isn't a lie to agree, because it really is part of it. Is it a lie to not bring up all the other stuff too? Her mouth pulls into a thin line. ”I'm not supposed to be in there,” She murmurs, ears folded against her neck. "I just- I just had a bad dream, and I wanted..." Out loud, it sounds childish. Tansypaw frowns and looks to Darkflame properly, "It's not really important anyway. Is there- What are we doing today?"

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